Managing Worry

Articles written in the “business” press about “how to” cope with stress tend to be split into two general categories: one type focuses on the physical effects of stress – how there is good stress and bad stress, but to ensure you get the correct balance you need to eat well, avoid toxins (alcohol, tobacco etc), exercise more and sleep well; and the other type tends to focus on the psychological aspects of stress – how you think and feel, what your interpersonal relationships are like, the context of your work environment etc, with the general message that greater awareness leads to greater control (and therefore less stress). Instead of “how to” deal with stress, what about the causes of stress? They are often overlooked and so I was pleased to see in the HBR “Pocket Mentor” series a chapter about managing worry – a major cause of stress (Hallowell, “Managing Stress – Expert Solutions to Everyday Challenges”, 2007).

 

Here’s how to manage worry (and therefore reduce stress) along with further implications (“et alors”).

 

Managing Worry

 

Worry is a major source of stress but according to the author, it can be easily overcome using a simple three-step plan. Whenever you start worrying about something:

 

Evaluate

 

Don’t ignore the worry; rather confront it and in particular, name it!  By defining the problem, you can already start to “put it in perspective” and reduce the worry!

 

Next, you need to think constructively about the problem. Challenge your assumptions – have you taken any shortcuts in your diagnosis? Correct errors in logic (talk it through with someone) and develop alternative hypotheses.

 

Plan

 

Replace toxic worry with “effective action”. The idea here is that worrying is only negative – replacing that with “doing something about it” (if possible) will help; but to do so, you need to plan!

 

Wise worry leads to fact gathering; toxic worry just “exaggerates and misrepresents reality.” Make a plan to address your worries; but also make sure you have structure in your personal organisation: according to the author, “anti-anxiety agents” include lists, reminders, schedules and agendas!

 

Remediate

 

There are only two key options here. Either, having isolated your worry and having taken steps to gather facts, you can now take direct action: change (yourself), connect or confront (others).

 

Or, “let it go”! Sometimes, your analysis of the worry will lead you to the conclusion that it is not worth time worrying about. If the matter is beyond your control or influence, you have to let the worry go. “Blow it away and start a new project, read a different book, walk another path…”

 

Et alors

 

The “evaluate” stage is critical and there is some good advice here: if the worry (and/or anxiety) is so strong that you are not thinking straight, you actually need to take time to think straight! Putting things in perspective can be achieved by both focusing and brainstorming to see exactly what the worry is. All well and good; however what about “planning” and “remediating”? Firstly, the “remediation” step might be best considered in conjunction with the “evaluation” step – from the outset it would be wise to consider what aspects of the “worry” you can influence or control and accordingly focus where you can actually have an impact. “Planning” might be described an “analyzing” in this context – a thorough review of the facts and context can probably help in any worrisome situation.

 

From a cultural point of view, the author appears to suggest steps which might work well for Americans in America, but perhaps not for everyone else anywhere else. Planning can cause as much stress to some people as worrying: some personality types and some cultures prefer to “live in the moment” and “go with the flow” (without any recourse to planning). Similarly, the call to “action” might be readily embraced by persons and cultures that have a preference for “extroversion” rather than “introversion” (with the associated inward-focused contemplation and reflection). Finally, the perspective seems to be very “individualistic” with the one person taking control not only for themselves but for the environment around them – perhaps not the starting point for a more “collectivist” culture. Anyway, not to worry!

Leading Under Stress

Leadership can be stressful. Not only does it take a lot of energy but the “challenge” is further compounded by the situation: many leaders may find themselves in a crisis and therefore under extraordinary stress. What to do in such a situation? Research led me to an article by Heifetz et al, “Leadership in a (Permanent) Crisis”, 2009, HBR where the authors point to “fostering adaptation” and “embracing disequilibrium” to engage and motivate followers through the crisis; however further to that they also provide five key guidance points to “take care of yourself” as a leader so that you don’t sacrifice yourself to the crisis by neglecting yourself.

Here’s how to lead under stress followed by further observations (“et alors”):

Leading Under Stress

The authors state that “taking care of yourself both physically and emotionally will be crucial to your success. You can achieve none of your leadership aims if you sacrifice yourself to the cause.” Here are the five things a leader needs to do to take care whilst leading under stress:

Be Both Optimistic and Realistic

Not just one or the other, but create a “healthy tension that keeps optimism from turning into denial and realism from devolving into cynicism.”

Find Sanctuaries

A sanctuary may be a place or an activity that allows you to step away and “recalibrate your internal responses”. In other words, take some quality time to “get away from it all”.

Reach Out to Confidents

Seek feedback from a true confident who cares more about you than the crisis. Usually a third party, this is someone to whom you can “articulate your reasons for taking certain actions.”

Bring More of Your Emotional Self to the Workplace

A leader cannot survive being too reserved. Under stress, an appropriate “display” of emotions can help to increase trust and defuse difficult situations.

Don’t Lose Yourself in Your Role

No matter how important your work is, don’t let “a single endeavor” define you. Besides making you vulnerable to changing circumstances, opportunities may be lost… 

Et alors

At once and at the same time, the leader needs to be able to “step out” and “step into” the situation. This can only be done if the leader is “authentic”, or otherwise put: the leader is the same person both in- and outside work. Stress from a crisis can easily “de-mask” the inauthentic leader and significantly reduce leadership effectiveness. Stepping-in can be getting the balance right between optimism and realism along with bringing more of your emotional self to work (i.e. your real self “behind the mask”); stepping-out can be ensuring that there is a sanctuary, a confident and above all else your own detachment to realize that your current project is just that and only that!